what a week

Saturday there was this:

walk in the woods on a warm day

The weather was sunny and the high was 60.
We went for a walk on the trail and enjoyed the warm, spring like weather.

it is amazing how plants will grow anywhere

 We saw signs on spring, we looked forward to continued warmer temperatures and everything turning green and beautiful.

Then on Sunday, we had this:

as soon as the snow started accumulating lily was out and playing

It started snowing around noon and didn't stop until 10pm that night.

all cozy beneath a blanket of snow

It took awhile for it to stick since it had been so warm the day before.

the yard toys covered with snow

But eventually everything including the roads were covered. We got about 8 inches of snow.
It was crazy, my kids loved it though:

lily loved the snow

Despite running a low grade fever and a bad cough Lily had played outside in the snow, she probably shouldn't have being sick and all, but this is our one and only snow this winter and I couldn't let her miss out.
Monday morning my classes were cancelled so we headed down the street for some fun in the snow before it melted. 

enjoying the sun after a very dreary Sunday snow day

We went out about 9:30 and it is a good thing, by the time we headed in around 11 the snow had melted substantially.

getting ready to head down the hill

It was amazing how 8 inches of snow could disappear so quickly.

lance enjoying the sunny snow day

By late afternoon you won't have known we had gotten more than an inch of snow on the ground.

Then yesterday, Wednesday we had this:

62 degrees 2-3 days after an 8 inch snowfall

and today it is suppose to be 70, it isn't a surprise that everyone is all congested, this weather is quite a roller coaster, we even had a thunderstorm last night, which was quite a surprise.
There are still a few piles of snow hiding out in the shade, somehow surviving the 60 degree weather, it seems weird to see a pile of snow when it is warm enough to be without a jacket.

the remains of our snowman

So it went from warm, spring to snowy winter, back to spring in five days.  Our one and only snow for the winter has come and gone and I am ready for spring and summer, but thankful for our one snowfall because it would be sad if we went a whole winter without one.

On totally unrelated news, to add to this crazy week: our washing machine is broken.  I normally do laundry on Thursdays and the bedsheets on Saturdays but in preparation for Disney and some extra motivation I did a load of laundry last night.  Shortly after starting the load, I realized that the washing machine wasn't not  emptying and spinning.  Upon investigation we discovered a part had broken, the door open sensor. Thanks to the Internet and Google we figured out what was broken with the machine and how to take the washing machine apart to get the broken part.  So today on my laundry day this is what my machine looks like:

Hopefully a local store in town will have the part we need so we don't have to order it.  I am thankful we found the problem and it isn't too big of a problem, but a little disappointed because I would love a front loading machine, I just don't want to spend the money on one especially if I have a working machine.

1 years anniversary

Last night was the one year anniversary of the fire that destroyed our business.
I never thought we would be here one year later.
This past year has been rough and I am totally amazed that we are still here, hanging on somehow.
We have reopened in a new location, started working on bicycles again (which has kept us treading water), learned that God is good and totally in control even though it may not feel  like it.
A lot has happened as a result of the fire:
I am now in graduate school in hopes of getting a better, more flexible job and have financial aid due to our loss from the fire
Jeff is now in school working on his undergraduate in graphic design so he will have something to fall back and help bring in income, once again with great financial aid due to our losses from the fire
thanks to Obama's stay in your home program and the fire our mortgage is ridiculously low so we will never move, ever, yet we still can't pay on the bills, but hopefully one day
I found a job I can do from home and though it is sporadic, hopefully it will help us to get ahead during the slow times
our marriage has made it through one of the roughest periods of our life and if we can survive this, I would like to think we can make it through anything
So a year ago it seemed as though our life was destroyed, but it didn't kill us, hopefully it did make us stronger and it is only up from here
A year later there is still an ache when I think about how everything went up from one careless cigarette, though it wasn't our home, it was our "second home," and there were lots of personal things and memories there and we can never get them back.
But it is only up and out from here

the ups and downs and life changes of a decade

A New Year always makes me look back at the previous year and see how life has changed, to figure out whether it is better or worse then the following
A New DECADE, makes me realize how much life has changed.

I remember New Year's Eve 10 years ago with Y2K, we waited in anticipation to see if the computer world really was going to crash and the world as we know it ending- it didn't, a tiny bit disappointing, though a similar change was going to happen a year and half later.

2000

it was an exciting year of changes
I graduated from college with a B.S. in Biology
I worked as a counselor at K-West (Kanakuk Kamps), one of the best places on Earth
I got married, the wedding was extremely special, my grandfather, Pop, walked me down the aisle which had been my dream since I was little, Jeff's best man Rob, was able to be there before him and his family left for China where they have been missionaries for the last 10 years, my dad's parents were able to attend and August 5th was the only day it didn't rain that summer!

2001

was good and bad
we opened Scene 3 Boardshop, our business in 2001 which was quite exciting

(our small group at the grand opening)

we celebrated my grandfather's 90th birthday, which was the last time my mom's side of the family was all together for a happy occasion

(the older woman on the left is my Great Aunt Clara, isn't she cute? my grandmother, Gram is center, and Pop is in the front to the right, he always had a smile)

in the spring, Jeff and I planned to go visit my dad's parents on a trip to Florida, unfortunately, my grandmother passed away a few weeks before our trip
then there was September 11th, I remember watching that second plane crash into the tower live on tv and how they didn't know what was happening, it was quite a scary day, the world as we knew it ended that day
2001 wasn't a bad year, but it ended badly, Pop who was visiting for Christmas fell and broke his hip, this was the beginning of the end

2002
I don't remember much, only that after a month in the hospital and a second surgery, Pop passed away
I was devastated, my dad died when I was eight and Pop was my father figure, he loved life, loved people, was generous, loving, and just a wonderful person
Losing him was extremely difficult, I was blessed with a month of seeing him everyday after his first hip surgery and before his second, but the loss still hurts
after Pop died, my Great Aunt Clara came and spent a month or two with Gram, helping her adjust to life alone,  Clara then passed away six months after Pop, my family seemed to be shrinking before my eyes
In the fall of 2002, I left my nanny job and started teaching high school biology, which was stressful, but I made some wonderful friends
Christy, Erica, Angela and I were the 4 Muskateers, who did almost everything together and had a blast, I am so thankful for their friendship and the good times we had

2003
still had the business, still taught, don't remember much, which isn't a bad thing, i think

2004
we bought our first house!  a little cape cod in a nice neighborhood that I still love 90% of the time

2005
got pregnant with Lance
began my 4th and final year of teaching high school biology
we also moved the store to a new location and saw the business grow
I coached the high school swim team with a friend, but unfortunately due to drama of one student resigned at the beginning of the season, which was probably a good thing since I was preggo

2006
Lance!  he changed our lives completely, it was a rough delivery and adjustment for me, but I can't imagine life without him

we also switched churches in the fall, it was a hard decision to make, but we know we made the best decision and love our one community

2007
life was getting a little tougher financially and it wasn't a good year for us in marriage happiness, but we survived
my sister got married and I got to be her matron of honor, it was fun to be in someone's wedding
I also got pregnant with Lily in the late fall

2008
one of the toughest years financially and for our marriage, but once again we survived
Lily arrived on the scene and though she is quite a handful and very opinionated, I love having a girl

Lance was diagnosed with a speech delay and despite weekly therapy did not make much progress, it was hard having two non-verbal children in the house
When Lily was 5 weeks old, I started a part-time assistant coaching position for a small college's swim team, it was stressful, but also a lot of fun and helped make those first couple of months fly by, despite the stress, I really enjoyed doing something outside of the home
Charles, my stepdad, kind of, moved to a nursing home due to his IBM disease decreasing his muscles in his arms and legs, this move has put a lot of stress on my mother and has been hard to see someone I care about fading away
also, Gram is healthy, but mentally she is gone and doesn't know who I am, it is hard to lose those you love

2009
the toughest year ever

I finished up the coaching position and unfortunately due to drama, things did not end as well as I would have liked, I did spend my last pay check on a DYSON vacuum, that months and months later I still LOVE, I also bought some FLOR, it was nice to blow my last paycheck on something fun and not bills
financially it has been extremely difficult, we had a hard time treading water and then the FIRE that destroyed the business put us on the bottom of the ocean

we re-opened in a new location, but people aren't spending money and times are extremely tough
on a positive, Lance started preschool and loves it, his vocabulary has increased tremendously  and I am so thankful for his teacher and the positive experience school has been so far
I also was accepted to graduate school and took my first class, I hope to get my masters and teach at the community college one day
2009 has been another tough year for our marriage, Jeff's coping mechanism is to hide or pretend there aren't problems and with lots of problems this year things have been rocky
Overall I am ready for 2009 to be over with

So this decade has had its ups and downs, I have changed dramatically as a person and I look forward to the future because I figure we can only go up from here

one week

when something suddenly happens time gets divided
for us there is BF, before the fire
life wasn't all roses before, but now, it is like some kind of innocence is lost, we took things for granted, we were naive, we were just like everyone else, now the world seems a bit darker


i still can't believe the shop burned to the ground
this past week we have gone a few times and recovered some things, some clothing, a signed pro skateboard, some old tax returns, a pair of snowboard boots, and some other random stuff which may or may not be salvageable



it has only been a week, but i am ready for the owners of the building to tear it down, so I can get some closure and move on and maybe then i could drive down the road and not get a pit in my stomach
I am ready for our new location to be up and running and then maybe lance would stop saying "dadda all gone," we don't know how much he understands what is going on but he tells his own story of the store with gestures and sound effects, he gestures a large fire, makes siren noise, makes gesture and sound for water being sprayed, and then says "all gone," he also has been hard to deal with and I don't know how much is it just being a 3 year old and how much is his sensing things are a bit weird and we are preoccupied?
we all need to get past this

i am still amazed that a cigarette or match could destroy so much

so there are moments of being totally overwhelmed and moments of hope, it is such a roller coaster ride
this coming week, we will hopefully be enjoying the beach and get some time together to away from all the chaos of life at home, and hopefully we can forget about what is loss
I need to focus on the the future and what we do have
the t-shirt in the picture survived the fire (and doesn't stink like everything else seems to), amazingly,
I hope we too will come out of this mess looking bright and clean, only time will tell, but thanks to lots of prayers and love, I think we can, kind of like the little engine that could