Monday, January 14, 2008

my heart goes out

To the women who have to go through the financial meeting and the nurse visit and then not be pregnant, it seems quite traumatic. Today I had the nurse visit. I had to fill out a questionnaire and we went over my medical history and any symptoms I have been having so far. I received paperwork about save dental procedures and drugs, consent forms for testing, a pregnancy book, and information about the birth center then I had urine test and blood taken. Both nurses said congratulations, and I thanked them and thought, it is weird, we haven't even seen if there is a baby yet, nor listened for a heartbeat, nothing, how do they even know there is something there. My heart aches for the women that I know and those I don't know who go through all this just to get to the ultrasound day and have there be nothing, all of this information and congratulations and it all ends in heartache. I think I could deal with a miscarriage or loss easier if you knew right away instead of having to go through all this other stuff. Jeff made a good point the other day, you could go through all of this without actually being pregnant, you just have to say you are and they take your word for it. I don't know why someone would want to, but it is possible.
I would like to think that of the 5 tubes of blood that one of them would be testing hormone levels, but who knows what all they are testing. I guess I think it should work like this: have ultrasound, then do the testing and money aspect, but I guess they want to make sure they have the money worked out first because you know money is the most important, note sarcasm. So I now have to sit and wait for 11 days until I FINALLY get to go to the doctor and see the baby. For me, this whole thing doesn't seem real, despite feeling ill and getting a bit of a tummy, I don't feel pregnant, it doesn't seem real yet. On a positive note: despite being worried about the blood test it wasn't as bad as I feared, it didn't take that long and I didn't feel woozy till I was practically home and was able to drink something sweet. I hate needles so I am excited that I have one blood test down, two more to go, but I have to admit, getting it taken out of the arm is a lot better than the finger prick, well, my arm is still a little sore so that might be debatable.

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