So today I broke it down and finally did a big grocery store trip to Walmart. I hate going so I have been putting it off for a week now and today I finally just went. As I was getting food for this week's menu and food that worked with my fast, all I could see was what I couldn't eat. I have been so focused these last three days on all the things I can't eat, that I am totally overlooking the things I can eat. A few of the women in the group are only eating 7 things all week, only 7 things and they are only using salt, pepper, and olive oil to make their food tasty. It hit me in the dairy section, why am I whining about my 7 missing things, when I have hundreds of other options?
Tonight for dinner we are having turkey burgers, olive oil french fries, baked beans, and macaroni and cheese. I am lamenting on my lack of bun and fries but I can still eat the beans, macaroni, and the burger itself. Why is the lack of bun my main focus and not on the fact that I can eat a whole and filling meal, where some of my others friends are eating beans and rice or bland chicken for the third night.
Focusing on what I don't have and not what I do is something that I am totally guilty of every single day. I am not a glass full person when it comes to myself and my life, for you I totally am, but not for me. I realized today that I look at the negatives in my life and do not always celebrate the positives and I don't know how to change that. I don't know how I got so focused on the negatives and what I don't have especially in comparison to others. Comparison kills, I know that, yet I am stuck in a cycle and can't seem to break the habit.
I want to be a glass half full kind of person and truly grateful, I am in some areas, but not in a lot of others. The negatives or the things I lack seem so loud and blaring and the positives so quiet and minuscule. I need to change, I just don't know how to start.