Friday, August 21, 2009

it's my birthday and i will cry if i want to

So today is my birthday, I am now 31.
Part of me knows that 31 isn't old, but I feel old, Heck, I just got use to the idea, wait, more like accepted the idea that I was 30 and now I am definitely 30-something. I remember in high school, being 30 seemed old, not like senior citizen old, but established with the 2.5 kids and a nice house and a tight group of friends with kids the same age, someone settled. I am not where I thought I would be at 31, I feel more like a 25 year old, trying to get it together. If I feel like this at 31, I don't want to think about how I am going to feel at 40. It is funny when you are young, you can't wait to be 13, a teenager, 16, able to drive a car, 18, an adult, etc and then the upper twenties come and you don't want to get any older, and at some point you want to start subtracting years and not adding to them. I guess it is just one of those situations where "you always want what you can't have." So I will try and embrace 31 and accept that I am now a 30-something and enjoy my young 30s because before I know it I will be 35, heck 40 and that is really old. just kidding, i think, jeff is 36 and he doesn't seem too old.


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